The Littlest

Two weeks! In just two weeks, she will be three.  And there will be no more babies in this house.

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I don’t feel any pangs of sadness that she is my last baby; in fact, this new stage, where they can all play together, stay up a little later, go to the bathroom without diapers, sleep without Binkies, and even (gasp!) swim together (with puddle jumpers!) without me actually IN the water…well, that’s like a breath of fresh air after almost eight years of hyper-vigilance.  Small steps of independence actually feel amazing, because even though I have tried to cherish these small stages, getting to take a step back myself feels pretty darn good.

But that doesn’t mean that I like the idea of my littlest about to be three.  How is that even possible.  Not a questions, just a statement.  It doesn’t even remotely feel possible.

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This little one is so full of contradictions–so very much a tomboy, with her Rescue Bots and Paw Patrol vehicles–and still can’t wait until it’s warm enough to wear her hand-me-down dresses from her sister.  She’s pink and blue and dolls and trucks and the perfect blend for the last kid because she is just so FUN.  The perfect companion.

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Her eyes are turning greener, her hair is getting longer, her sass is undeniable and she is full of shenanigans.  But no matter what, she’s pretty darn amazing, and I will take shenanigans every day of the week to just hear her say, “Will you tell me a story about school?” and “Where are you going?  You come back?”  Yes, baby girl, Mommy always comes back.

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Her smiles and laughs and yes, even whines, keep me going every day.  Thank God we had three.  Thank God for Little H and how she fills my soul and completes our family.

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The world, our world, my world is a better place because of that smile.

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